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The Life of a Goblin

from Purple Shame by Granny and The Boon

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about

The purple pair lament the plight of goblinkind, and definitely do not try to emotionally manipulate their listeners for profit.

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lyrics

LYRICS:

I was born as a goblin, I’ll die as one too
This story is tragic and sad
For the life of a goblin is not very nice
In fact, it’s particularly bad

For the ladder of life is a symbol of hope
For all those who can climb to the top
But so many successes are born on the backs
Of the goblins stuck down in the slop

Where would the heroes of legend all be
Without goblins to slaughter with impunity?
And just how would they reach the requisite ex-pe-
-riences to fulfil their profound destinies?

For heroes are treated as kings of the world
But the goblins are jesters and fools
For the life of a goblin is cruel, so cruel
The life of a goblin is cruel

The watchers all hide a dark secret
So we’re gonna start whistle blowing
For ritual circles don’t light up by magic
It’s goblins that keep it all glowing
They’re all chained underground and they turn a big wheel
So people can see when the circle is sealed
...And they only get fed on a horrible gruel...
For the life of a goblin is cruel, so cruel, the life of a goblin is cruel

You rich folk all like to buy armour
From traders like Darkblade and Chow’s
And it’s all very reasonably priced there
But have you ever stopped to think how?
There’s hundreds of goblins all slaving away
Making your chain for a copper a day
...And they’re not even given appropriate tools...
For the life of a goblin is cruel, so cruel, the life of a goblin is cruel

When you’ve been fighting your battles all day
Who do you think drags the corpses away?
We’re so quiet and stealthy you never would know

When you feel the calling of nature
You visit the square shrine of Lugh
And by now you can probably imagine
How they really get rid of the poo
There’s a whole bunch of goblins all stuffed in a wagon
They suck even more than the king of the Dragons
...They wish they were fed on a horrible gruel...
For the life of a goblin is cruel, so cruel, the life of a goblin is cruel

Yes when you’re a goblin your tears fall like rain
So please make a donation to lessen our pain
We’d like to have cash, but we’ll also take jewels...
For the life of a goblin is cruel, so cruel, the life of a goblin is cruel

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credits

from Purple Shame, released August 19, 2018
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TRACK CREDITS:

Lyrics and music by Andy Tucker and Sammi Searle

Performed by:

-- Andy Tucker - Vocals, Guitar

-- Sammi Searle - Vocals, Ukulele, Keyboard

Recorded, produced, mixed and mastered by Phil Callan at Red Banner Studios

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license

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Granny and The Boon image

Granny and The Boon London, UK

The tyrannical Granny Amanita and her long suffering sidekick Boondoggle are maladjusted goblins from the magical world of Erdreja. Born into a life of slavery, they have now tasted sweet freedom and are out to make the most of it!
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Granny and Boondoggle are fictional characters from the Lorien Trust Live Roleplaying System. These songs are based on the peculiar world and stories of that game. ... more

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